love story part 13

sidharth was disturbed. his heart longed for diya but he was getting frustrated. diya had built a wall around her heart and refused to reason. he was getting angry when he kept losing out arguing with her, rationalising to make her come back. diya was hurt. he knew that but he didnt know how to let her udnerstand how he was not arvind.
with days rolling away, sid tried to speak to diya. contrary to the past, diya atleast spoke to sid normally.she often grew a barrier only when he broached the subject of them getting back together as a couple. sidharth decided to give her time to heal, yet he made sure he didnt let go of her to someone else. he knew no-one else could love her the way he did.
diya was again becoming incresingly confortable with sid, this time as a friend. he was once someone who knew her very well. sid and diya both discovered each other more as friends than they ever did as a couple.

date : 2009
sid: diya, do you realise how much i know you better now than before? man, we should have started out as friends.
diya: yes sid. true. i feel so confortable with you around at my back. you are a good friend than a possesive boyfriend :P
sid: but diya, what i wanted was a relationship, now that we know each other well.
diya: sid, lets not talk of a relationship.

it happened every time. every one time sid wanted a relationship diya stopped talking. it frustrated sid to no end and sometime he spoke words he regretted.

sid: whats wrong with me diya? am i not the same person you fell in love with?
diya: no sid, you are not. you do know how much i hate smoking, drinking and one night stands dont you?
the sid i fell in love with, didnt do any of it. i dont know the sid i talk to now a days.
sid: well as if you are the same.
diya: what do you mean?
sid: you've been with someone else too diya. dont act all saintly.
diya: sid, am hurt by that sentence. nothing happened.
sid: ya right.

every time sid lost his temper and spoke something, diya felt terribly hurt. sid was frustrated. he wanted his diya back. diya was frustrated too.she wanted her sid back. both were searching for their own dopplegangers. sid finally decided to open up to diya.

he made her listen to how he had spoken to his parents, had given up on one night stands, smoking and drinking and how he was the same sid she fell in love with. sid recalled one incident from the past when they were in a relationship. as the calls were STD, sid used to skip lunch to save up for the calls he made to diya to speak longer. diya was moved as she heard all this stories from sid. she cried. for the first time it was tears of both happiness and love and sorrow of missing the person.
diya: sid, why didnt you tell me all this before?
sid: i wanted you to realise am still the same without me telling. but you never understood me diya. so what do you say? get back to me?
diya: sid! i cant.
sid: but why?
diya: sid you only talk about things from your perspective. i have quit my job. and i dont have any bodys support.my parents are not talking to me and its taking me time to set my career right. how can i think of a relationship now. maybe you ll be better if you start dating someone else.
sid: talk to your mom. this time around, i want you to tell your parents and friends that you are dating me before you get together with me?
diya: but why?
sid: so that you dont run away from me again. you ll be tied down.
diya: is that what you think of me sid?

sid immediately knew it was too late to correct his blunder. diya had shut herself again. nothing happened till may 2010. diya and sid were still friends. sid was diya's best friend and diya was sid's love of his life. it was diya's birthday. the last birthday she was spending at home as she was all ready to leave home to fly to the USA for her masters. it was sid who with her through thick and thin, encouraging her and supporting her every decision. deep down, diya knew that if she was doing her masters, it was because of one person. sid. the one person she always loved despite all that happened and the one person to whom she couldnt profess her love. sid couldnt be more happier. and he c ouldnt love anyone more, than his diya. the one person who still spoke to him inspite of him talking bull shit to her. the one person who didnt take to heart his spiteful words but still understood his real intentions. things were going smooth between diya and sid.

diya confessed to madhu before she left.
diya: this is one guy i left. i didnt try to sort out the issues when i broke the relationship off madhu. and now when i know the kinda mistake i made after arvind's episode. how can i get back to sid. is it not shameless on my part to do that? sid deserves better than me madhu. i cannot shamelessly go back to him and torture him with my presence.
madhu: sweetie, he loves you. he wont think of it that way.
diya: no madhu, i thought so too. but you know the words you say when you are angry are the ones that come from your heart and whenever hes angry, all that he can talk about is my past with arvind. he s not over the fact that i was with someother guy madhu. i cannot take that all my life. yes arvind was a mistake but i dont need a reminder from sid about it. he wont be happy with me madhu.
madhu: do you love him?
diya: (remains silent)
madhu: speak up you idiot. do you?
diya: (breaks down) more than anything else madhu. always have. the first time i came away from him because he didnt trust me. now am coming away from him because i love him too much and i know he deserves someone better. someone with whom he ll be happy.
madhu: diya. i dont know what to say. come here babes. (hugs diya as she silently cries)

sid knew very well that diya was in love with him. he tried reasoning, sarcasm, anger, and what not to get her back. diya for some reason didnt come back to him. all her reasons seemed like crap to him. he knew he couldnt go on for ever like this. thats when megha proposed to sid.

sid had completed his dual degree masters in bio tech in delhi and flown to germany for his doctrate. a fellow doctrate was megha who had fallen for sid a long time back. sid occasionally used to talk about diya and how he couldnt get her back to megha. and now she had proposed. on side was megha with whom he could start a new life and on the other was his own diya. the one person he couldnt stop loving and couldnt see as someone elses.

madhu took it as her job to try and reason with diya. she convinced diya that sid was the man for her. it took her a months time to reason it out with diya. diya slowly was getting convinced that she wanted to get back to sid. she spoke to her parents about him. the vasishts never had any good opinion about him but they saw the love in diyas eyes. they relented. diya was happy that she did what sid wanted. - speaking to her parents. she was about to fly to USA the next night and she called up sid to tell him the happy news.

diya:sid am leaving tomorrow. its all because of you sid. i love you.
sid: love you too babe. i need to tell you something.
diya: really? even i have something to tell you. something very happy. oh how i wish you are here now.
sid: what is it?
diya: you go first sid. what is it?
sid: do you remember how you used to tell me that i should start seeing someone else? well there is one megha who proposed.
diya: (shocked) and?
sid: am confused diya. you never tell me if you love me. if you tell me something once and for all i will respond to meghas proposal.
diya: do you like her?
sid: well ya, i do. but..
diya: (feigning happiness) what are you waiting for? go tell her you idiot.
sid: you think so?
diya: absolutely.
sid: thanks diya. you are the best. (hangs up)

diya put the phone down. she locked her room and sat on the couch. tears silently plonked down on the floor from her eyes. she hurt beyond words. she had lost him again. she cried all night.

she went to meet madhu before she left to the airport. she told her all that happened. madhu was angered. how could he fall in love with some girl so soon?
diya just smiled for everything. madhu cried to see her friend this way and the fact that she was going half the world away from her. diya cried too. to leave her parents, madhu and all the memories here.

date: november 2010
place: stanford univ

diya: madhuuuuuuuuuuuuu.... its been long since i called you. how are you.
madhu: babeeee... love ya. been long.enjoying?
diya: you know me. am fine. having a ball of a time
madhu: ball of a time.? i know you babe. still feeling bad huh?
diya: guess who i met here. tom cruiseeee.
madhu: babe. are you truly happy? (in a serious concerned voice) you should have told sid of your love.
diya: (wry smile) and what? put him through a life time of misery thinking about arvind and me?
i know sid better than sid himself madhu. he loved me like noone else can but he was never over arvind. he was in a dilemma.
madhu: but you are making yourself unhappy.
diya: madhu. i love sid. i love sid so much that i only want his happiness. even when i know its not going to be with me.
madhu: diya....
diya: dont tell anything madhu. love is not just being with the person. should i hate him now that he's moved on? i would still love him. more than ever. knowing that he is happy makes me happy. i hurt him once madhu. and i wouldnt want to hurt him again. my heart will always be around him. my classes are starting love. will call later.

madhu was contemplating about what diya said as she put the phone down. she was proud of her diya. she looked back at the entire sid-diya episode. 8 years. one hell of a time. long time too. but she knew diya was right. diya's words kept echoing. i love him so much that i want his happiness even if its not going to be with me. madhu closed her eyes as a tear creeped out.

diya was sad yet content that sid was finally at peace. he would not need to worry that it was his fault that diya faced arvind. wouldnt have to feel bad for diya and can atlast be happy with a fresh new start.

well folks thats how the story ends. sid is now with megha. diya is still in love. with sid. but is happy knowing that he is happy with megha. and as for me. i shall take leave now :) hope you guys enjoyed reading about sid and diya